GRADES, GRADES and MORE GRADES
I wasn't smart.  I never have been.  I was the little girl in the classroom who was sent to the corner for talking too much.  But I never really misbehaved.  I never really did anything to be noticed, but just enough to be annoying.
I was defiant, not necessarily by action, but definitely by words.  By 14, I thought I knew it all, so I would share the depth of my knowledge with the masses.  So, I was too good to be given the answers - I thought I had them all.
I had never cheated in my life - but one day, in the sweltering heat, I had to take a math test.  My self-teaching books were right beside me.  I didn't know the answer, and the only classes I was passing with flying colors were music classes.  I needed to pass this test, so mom would get off my back.  The instant I started to look up the answer was the instant she came around the corner.  I was caught  - but I wasn't caught cheating, I was caught not knowing the answer.  To me, that was worse than anything else.
I watched myself after that.  I had to make sure that I either had enough answers to pass the classes or enough justifications why I wasn't passing.  I needed an out so that I would never be wrong.
As we prepared to move back stateside for what was to be my last year of High School, I was asked to take a test to enroll in a private school.  My mom was worried I wouldn't pass.  I hadn't been an A student since middle school.
It took me a few hours to complete the exam.  To everyone's amazement (including my own) I received high scores.  I was immediately accepted.
In college, again, I did just enough to get by.  I spent most of my time with friends and boyfriends, eating, going to the mall or movies, etc.  - The college life.  To me, classes and grades were a joke - just life's punchline for our ridicule - so I wasn't going to let it get the best of me - I would go just far enough - I was the epitome of mediocre - and I was ok with that.  I was sure it didn't matter to anyone else, so why should it matter to me?
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Colossians 3:23-25 And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the L-rd, and not unto men; Knowing that of the L-rd ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for you serve the L-rd Messiah. But he that doeth wrong shall receive for the wrong which he hath done: and there is no respect of persons. 
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Thursday, May 04, 2006
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